Sabrina Lakhani

For 15 years, I was paid by some of the world's largest companies to understand why people do what they do, not just what they say.

Across industries, countries, and cultures, one thing became clear:

We all inherit patterns from childhood.

Patterns that quietly shape our relationships, reactions, and decisions.

I founded Patterns to Presence to address this directly.

It's a structured, evidence-based system designed to help you see and work with the patterns shaping your life.

These patterns influence who you choose, what you tolerate, and how far you go.

My approach

By analyzing your writing, I identify the patterns driving your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.

It usually takes only a few entries of your writing for these patterns to become clear.

For example, I might see that you sense something early, don't trust it, and adapt yourself to keep the relationship stable.

Seeing your patterns clearly is the first step in changing them.

My path to this work

This work was personal before it was professional.

I grew up in a South Asian immigrant joint family, where I became aware early on of the gap between what people said and what they did.

In my twenties, I went through a marriage and divorce and began to question what I was repeating and why.

That led me to look more deeply at trust, behavior, and relationships, and to study what actually drives them.

Attachment science gave me a framework for patterns I had been sensing for years, and the realization that they shape how we relate unless we actively change them.

It took me over five years to do the work needed to build a secure relationship, because I was figuring it out on my own.

Today, I live in Seattle with my husband and our two dogs, and I bring that lived experience into the work I do with others.